Resume Gaffes

A couple of years back I had posted about some of the idiotic things that people write in their CVs. Lessons were not learnt it seems … till date we see thousands of such resumes with grammatical mistakes.

If you have a grammar nazi for an HR team (and yes, we do) … then your resume will not get shortlisted … here’s a list of #facepalms which we have seen over the months. Instead of just posting them here and making fun of these excerpts, I’ve decided to be more constructive and give feedback on how to avoid these errors

Using Long Motherhood Statements

Seeking position for an organization that will utilize my skills, talent and Management aptitude, so that I may propel it’s growth and development, while also contributing to my personal and professional fulfillment.

Looking for a position where talent, sense of responsibility, commitment and output of work is required for personal along with professional growth.

Stuff such as too many clauses, long generic statements are a complete turn-off. This is a matter of personal opinion, but I think putting such things in your CV is a waste of time. The only reason I would want to read these lines is to ridicule them. If you are applying for a job, then your objective should be just that … and no need to put that down on paper, since the reason you sent that paper across is to get a job.

Why beat around the bush, just directly get down to it … it will save the recruiter’s time and that is appreciated.

Grammatical Errors and Typos

Although I am a recent post graduate, my technical knowledge, my practical experience and eagerness to learn and be a part of  your organization will surely make an additional assistance.

I would like to express my interest in a position as HR Executive in your establishing organization.

When you are done framing your resume for the first time, be sure to get it reviewed by at least 2-3 different people. Try to look for a grammar nazi … between the lot of you, errors will come out. Make a note of these and be sure to correct them! Send the updated document across to everyone at the end of this exercise. You will be surprised with the improvement in your document.

CV Gaffes

We are hiring, and are screening resumes of different candidates for interviews. Some of the resumes that we came across are hilarious and I thought I might take the liberty of sharing it here (I am not disclosing the identity of the people, but if your CV does contain a line or two from these selected gems, then consider rewriting your resume!)

  • Seeking an environment to relish the constructive attitude and fulfill my appetite of success by facilitating the organization with my skills and abilities.
  • To use and enhance my educational as well as professional skills with dedications and commitment in the best possible way do as to acquire symmetric height for me and my organization.
  • To be an efficient part of a reputed organization and enhance my abilities while working to attain objectives of organization. I would like to work amongst Network of Skilled Professionals in a dynamic and highly demanding atmosphere.
  • Looking forward for a dynamic career in today’s challenging business environment Achieving organization objective as well as professional growth in an environment of co-operation of team spirit. Reach the top positioning my career and to attain the goal of life.
  • I want to have challenging career in growing organization, which gives opportunities to utilize the skills and contribute to rise up in the learning curve and which values professionalism, by demonstrating high energy levels, ethics and integrity.
  • To Pursue growth Oriented Career with a Progressive Company that provides scope to apply my knowledge & Skill which would also help me to Contribute my best to best Organization
  • To establish myself as a successful professional known for emerging victorious from challenging situations and completing given task thus helping company to new heights and fulfilling my dreams.

I do not understand why people keep career objectives in their resumes. Not only is it a waste of space, but also the recruiter does not glean anything (except maybe a chuckle or two) from it. Most of the objectives I have seen are bloated and filled with hot air – save the recruiter some trouble and directly cut to the chase.

Resume tips: Putting the right foot forward

We always keep talking about customizing one’s resume to match the job we are targeting. In order to understand this better, I posted a question on the HR forums on LinkedIn.

Findings as follows –

  • If you are a Fresher
    1. Focus on projects and seminars, do your homework on these parts
    2. Do not forget your academics, and also the institute you are graduating from
    3. Extracurricular activities make a difference between a bland resume and a resume with a personality matching yours
  • If you are an Experienced Professional
    1. Relevant experience
    2. Team management skills
    3. Job stability
  • If you are aiming for a Senior Management position
    1. Leadership abilities and team building skills
    2. Richness of experience and high bandwidth of skills
    3. Crisis management

What do you think? Feel free to add to the LinkedIn discussion or through comments below!